Bible Passage: “And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself.” (1 Samuel 18:3 NIV)
Scripture Reading: John 13:34-35
I once heard a sermon series called “The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating.” At the heart of the series was a powerful question:
“Are you the person that the person you are looking for is looking for?”
Every man wants the perfect wife, and yet few of us do the work to become the kind of man that the woman we are looking for is dreaming about marrying.
The same truth holds when it comes to friendships.
Are you the friend that the friend you are looking for is looking for?
You likely know what it’s like to be lonely and to wish you had more or better friends. Some of you watched the World Series alone even though you didn’t want to. Others just wish you had people to hunt with, play pickleball with, or discuss the latest iPhone release with.
And maybe you have World Series friends, but wish you knew someone you felt safe discussing your doubts with or confessing your sins to.
Jesus describes the perfect friend with one word:
Love.
The brother you are looking for is a brother who will love you.
Hundreds of years before Jesus came to earth, we learn that the defining characteristic of David’s friendship with Jonathan was “love” (1 Samuel 18:3).
In modern Western culture, men often shy away from telling other men that we love them or from admitting that we want a male friend who loves us.
We also tend to narrow the scope of love.
We love women, smoked meat, and sports teams.
We rarely think of love as a life perfectly lived in all dimensions.
A friend who loves you might risk challenging your issues, lead you on a crazy adventure, see you promoted instead of them, invite you into bold political action, and/or feast with you.
I’ll leave you with a statement and a question.
The brother you are looking for is a brother who would love you like Jesus does.
Are you on a trajectory to become the kind of man who loves his brothers the way Jesus does?
Prayer: Lord, expand my vision of what it means to be a friend and brother. Help me focus more on the kind of brother I can be to others than on what I want from others. Deepen the relationships I have and add to them as You see fit. Let us all live with a deeper passion to be Your friend and walk together with You. Amen
Reflection: Where and how do you love your male friends well? In what ways does God want you to love them better?
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