A few years ago, I asked a room full of men a simple question:
“How many of you want to be a great dad?”
Every hand went up.
I’ve asked that question in different churches with different men across Canada, and the response is almost always the same.
Whether they are raising young kids, navigating the teenage years, praying for adult children, or investing in the lives of the next generation as spiritual fathers, most men have a deep desire to be the best fathers they can be.
The challenge is not usually a lack of desire, but that many fathers are unsure whether they are doing it right.
Fatherhood has become more complicated. Men are navigating expectations from every direction. We are told to succeed professionally, provide financially, be emotionally available, be spiritually mature, be involved in every activity, and somehow balance it all without ever feeling overwhelmed.
Add to that the endless amount of parenting content available today. There is always another podcast, another book, another post, or another expert explaining what we should be doing differently. Even articles like this one can unintentionally add to the noise.
But something I have discovered through years of ministry is this:
Most fathers are not looking for more pressure. They are looking for encouragement. They are looking for someone to remind them that what they’re doing matters.
Deep within the heart of fathers is a desire to protect, provide, lead, and leave something meaningful behind. I believe that desire reflects something about the heart of God Himself.
Most fathers are not looking for more pressure. They are looking for encouragement.
Our Heavenly Father is a God who loves, leads, protects, disciplines, forgives, and pursues His children (e.g., 1 John 3:1; Psalm 23; Luke 15:11-32; etc.). Throughout Scripture, we see the importance of fathers and families in God’s plan (e.g., Genesis 1:27-28; Psalm 127:3-5; Ephesians 6:4; etc.).
The Church has an incredible opportunity before us—not to replace dads, create unrealistic expectations, or make fathers feel like they are failing, but to come alongside them, strengthen them, and remind them that they have been entrusted with one of the greatest callings they will ever receive.
Family Was God’s Idea
When we read Scripture, one thing becomes abundantly clear: family was God’s original design.
Before there was a nation of Israel, there was a family. Before there was a temple, there were homes where faith was passed from one generation to another. Before there were church buildings, there were parents teaching their children about the goodness and faithfulness of God.
Psalm 78 gives us a beautiful picture of God’s desire for generations:
“We will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, His power, and the wonders He has done… so the next generation would know them” (Psalm 78:4; v.6).
Faith was never meant to be something we simply experience in a building for one hour a week. Faith was always meant to be lived out in everyday moments: around the dinner table, in conversations in the car, walking through difficult seasons, at bedtime prayers, and in moments of celebration and struggle.
The family has always been one of God’s primary places for discipleship.
This means the Church has a tremendous opportunity. We don’t replace the role of fathers; we strengthen it. We don’t compete with families; we equip them.
Here’s how.
Champion the Importance of Fathers
If something matters, we should talk about it.
One of the simplest things churches can do is champion fatherhood, not just once a year on Father’s Day, but throughout the year.
Our culture is often quick to highlight where fathers have failed. While there are certainly broken stories that need healing, we should also celebrate the countless men who are faithfully showing up every day—the father who works hard to provide, prays with his children, apologizes when he gets it wrong, serves others, or the spiritual father who invests in younger generations.
Scripture gives us a beautiful picture of the importance of spiritual fatherhood:
“For though you have countless guides in Christ, you do not have many fathers” (1 Corinthians 4:15).
The Church has always needed spiritual fathers. We still do.
Pastors and men’s ministry leaders have an opportunity to tell stories, preach messages, create workshops, and build environments that remind men that fatherhood is a significant calling.
The Church has always needed spiritual fathers. We still do.
Let’s celebrate and encourage fathers, calling men upward into the responsibility and privilege God has given them.
Create Opportunities for Fathers and Children to Serve Together
One of the most powerful discipleship environments is often not a classroom. It’s serving together.
There is something transformational that happens when fathers and children work side by side for something bigger than themselves.
Maybe it is serving at a community outreach event, helping a neighbor, participating in a church project, supporting a local ministry, or going on a mission opportunity together.
When families serve together, faith becomes more than something we talk about; it becomes something we live.
Children begin seeing that following Jesus impacts every area of life. They see generosity, compassion, sacrifice. They see their dads living out the Gospel.
Deuteronomy 6:7 reminds us that faith formation happens in the ordinary rhythms of life:
“Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”
The spiritual formation of children happens through conversations and experiences. Churches can create environments where fathers and children have opportunities to build those moments together.
Include Sons and Daughters in Spiritual Formation
I am incredibly thankful for children’s ministries and youth ministries. They are essential parts of a healthy church.
But we need to be careful not to unintentionally communicate that spiritual growth happens somewhere down the hall while parents wait for their children to finish.
One of the greatest opportunities we have is helping families experience spiritual moments together.
Create opportunities for families to worship together, encourage parents to take communion with their kids, and teach dads how to pray and read Scripture with their families. Celebrate moments when generations are connected.
One of the greatest opportunities we have is helping families experience spiritual moments together.
Real discipleship happens when one generation intentionally passes faith to the next (Psalm 145:4).
Take Away the Pressure of Perfection
One of the greatest gifts we can give fathers is permission to be honest.
The reality is simple: no parent is perfect. Sometimes churches unintentionally create an image that dads need to have everything together.
But behind this image are fathers carrying questions, regrets, and fears.
“Am I doing enough?”
“Did I make too many mistakes?”
“What do I do when my child walks away from God?”
The Church should be one of the safest places for fathers to bring these struggles.
We should create environments where men can ask for help, receive prayer, and experience grace.
Let’s pray for prodigals, encourage fathers walking through difficult seasons, and remind men that God’s work in their lives is not finished (Philippians 1:6).
Tell Stories That Bring Hope
Stories have incredible power.
Jesus understood this. Much of His teaching came through stories because stories help people see themselves differently.
Every man has stories worth telling—stories of restoration, forgiveness, families rebuilt, and of ordinary men who simply kept showing up.
When we tell these stories, we remind people that God is still working.
People may forget a sermon outline, but they remember stories of hope.
A Long Obedience in the Same Direction
One of the greatest opportunities before the Church today is helping fathers rediscover the power of faithful, consistent spiritual rhythms.
We often search for the perfect strategy when what families need most are simple patterns of faithfulness: Praying together, worshiping together, serving together, reading Scripture together, choosing Jesus together.
Fatherhood is not built through one unforgettable moment. It is built through thousands of ordinary moments where dads consistently point their children toward Jesus.
Eugene Peterson described discipleship as “a long obedience in the same direction.”
The same can be said about parenting.
We are not raising perfect children; we are discipling the next generation.
The Church can strengthen fathers, encourage families, and create environments where the next generation encounters the love of God.
When fathers are strengthened, families become healthier.
When families become healthier, churches become stronger.
And when churches become stronger, communities experience the transforming hope of Jesus.
That is a legacy worth investing in.
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