Bible Verse: “The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.” Romans 8:6
Scripture Reading: Song of Songs 1-2
“Don’t have sex until you’re married.
“Porn is bad.”
“You don’t want to get STDs or have a child out of wedlock.”
Young singles often hear these prominent messages regarding what to do with our sex drives. While the statements are true, the focus tends to be on the negative side of sex, as we fail to hear the side about why God thought sexual desires were a gift for us.
Most of us haven’t been discipled in biblical sexuality, so while the desires rage within us, we learn about sex from ungodly sources, which leads to confusion and shame.
Romans 8:6 says, “The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.”
God’s ideal is not that we feel constant shame and guilt around sexuality but that we embrace that part of ourselves. He wants us to learn to submit to His leading so that we’ll have peace in stewarding our sexual desires instead of shame.
In the Song of Songs, two lovers are excited about their upcoming union. They can’t wait to sleep together and fully embrace the excitement of their godly sexual expression together. They know that the desire is good, but it is essential to not awaken it until the right time (Song of Songs 2:7).
This is a good thing.
God created sex with numerous benefits. He even designed it to be enjoyable. Often, we focus on the end goal of intercourse and orgasm, but even in foreplay and the emotional connection, there is joy to be had.
We were made to desire pleasure, enjoy beauty and long for the touch of our lover. God has made us capable by His Spirit to steward these well.
Whether you’re married or single, consider:
- How do you feel about sex, being naked together, foreplay, and anything else associated with this gift from God?
- What are your feelings and beliefs about sex that came from porn, media, secular research, or ungodly influences?
- What would you believe about sex if you had only learned about it from Scripture?
Talking about our feelings and beliefs with our spouses and/or God-fearing friends is beneficial.
God wants us to enjoy the gift of sex in a God-honouring way, without the feelings of shame and confusion.
Prayer: Lord, help me to view this area of my life only through what You say about it, and help me to avoid the lies and pulls of any ungodly influence.
Reflection: Review the 3 questions listed above — what insights do you gain about yourself? About God? About sex?
If you or someone you know are struggling with sexual issues, we encourage you to reach out to Restored Ministries. Restored Ministries is for both men and women who wrestle with sexual addiction, betrayal, abuse and more.
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